As i thought...the guilty conscience is still there. so i end up kemas the whole house...thought of moping skali but i guess the guilty level is not that high...sapu2 sudey...huhu~
owh btw, A text me some messages...
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
A: Shi..shi sehat? Nape menyepi je lately?
Me: menyepi? xpon. juz x online kt YM je kot..
A: Huhu..erm..tu la, tetibe je dh mghilang..shi kt ne ni?
Me: kt aprtmnt
A: Erm seri kmbangan? so cmane fyp? evrythin ok?
Me: yep, ok je sume...
A: Owh..gud then..neway, take care k..sory ganggu..
Me: No prob, u too take care..
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
as advised by Teri, i juz anta msg2 pendek2...aih~ rase kesian plak tp better rase kesian than rase tak tentu arah mcm aritu...huhu~ mianhe (>_<)
Sunday, May 29, 2011
Saturday, May 28, 2011
guilty conscience
i discovered that i have this habit where suddenly i'm feeling very RAJIN to kemas bilik or kemas rumah. when i say rajin, it means REALLY rajin. making sure everything is squeaky clean. which made me wonder...WHY?
how come all of the sudden jadi rajin? after a few years pondering...huhu...i have a conclusion. GUILTY CONSCIENCE!
feeling bad that i didn't do something that i was suppose to do...and my body automatically feels guilty and cleans the house...lol!
but seriously, i've been neglecting my FYP, not going to COIT to do my FYP. and then suddenly laily asking "macam mane projek?" thats the shock i needed. next day, trus 1 bilik i kemas. ingatkn nk kemas 1 umah tp mebi tomoro klu still feel the guiltyness....hehe~
starting to download whatever needed and learn back wutever necessary...aih~ troublesome (T_T)
update:
1. A text me: Morning..start ur day wit ur beauty smile k..manela tau,kot2 ad org tetibe suke tgk shi senyum, then trus blanje tgk pirates of carribean ;) hv a nice day, TC
2. A PMed me at YM: shi, mane menghilang?
am i overthinking about this or what? adoila...alergic2~
how come all of the sudden jadi rajin? after a few years pondering...huhu...i have a conclusion. GUILTY CONSCIENCE!
feeling bad that i didn't do something that i was suppose to do...and my body automatically feels guilty and cleans the house...lol!
but seriously, i've been neglecting my FYP, not going to COIT to do my FYP. and then suddenly laily asking "macam mane projek?" thats the shock i needed. next day, trus 1 bilik i kemas. ingatkn nk kemas 1 umah tp mebi tomoro klu still feel the guiltyness....hehe~
starting to download whatever needed and learn back wutever necessary...aih~ troublesome (T_T)
update:
1. A text me: Morning..start ur day wit ur beauty smile k..manela tau,kot2 ad org tetibe suke tgk shi senyum, then trus blanje tgk pirates of carribean ;) hv a nice day, TC
2. A PMed me at YM: shi, mane menghilang?
am i overthinking about this or what? adoila...alergic2~
Friday, May 20, 2011
i'm going crazy
seriously!
A just text me just now. tau ape content die? "Nytez...sweet dream..;-)"
da la tgh sakit kepala ni. i'm really in big trouble...mcm mane nk solve ni...????????????
----------------------
i had just PMed teri seeking for advise. tgk nick2 len yg online kt YM sume mcm kanak2 ribena lg...really glad i PMed him. die byk bg advise on how to handle this problem...alternatives and such. he understood how i feel and gave a LOT of alternatives in handle the problem...sgt2 berterima kasih (^^)
A just text me just now. tau ape content die? "Nytez...sweet dream..;-)"
da la tgh sakit kepala ni. i'm really in big trouble...mcm mane nk solve ni...????????????
----------------------
i had just PMed teri seeking for advise. tgk nick2 len yg online kt YM sume mcm kanak2 ribena lg...really glad i PMed him. die byk bg advise on how to handle this problem...alternatives and such. he understood how i feel and gave a LOT of alternatives in handle the problem...sgt2 berterima kasih (^^)
Thursday, May 19, 2011
Trouble
OMG OMG OMG !!!!
i think i'm in trouble (>_<)
A just PMed me in YM. it sez..."Hye awk...;-P"
usually he'll refer me as sushi or shi...but now...
i wasn't just shocked. i'm terrified! i think i might have just gave him the wrong idea last night...waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa~
ottoke??!!
i think i'm in trouble (>_<)
A just PMed me in YM. it sez..."Hye awk...;-P"
usually he'll refer me as sushi or shi...but now...
i wasn't just shocked. i'm terrified! i think i might have just gave him the wrong idea last night...waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa~
ottoke??!!
Regrets...?
woke up this evening dlm pukul 2pm...dem! tibe2 teringat kt 2PM band. anyways, suddenly i wondered something. how would i have treated someone that i had just confessed to? Kate lah i confessed to D that i actually liked him back in the days...and then we go out for a dinner and movie. how would i have treated him? like A treated me? very friendly and talking a lot and telling stories about my problems in the past?
OMG! i just realized something. dinner & movie. isn't that what people who are dating do? ke i think too much?!
i'm starting to regret now. what the hell did i just do last night. now i nak YM pon cam takot nnt die buzz...adeh~
i realize i dun like going out with just ONE guy. sbb bile kluar, rase macam he watches everything i do. attentive sgt. and i dun like it one bit. maybe that's why i xde bf. i have intimacy problems...great! just great! *sigh* Girls would kill for attention but NO...not me...what is wrong with me? oh right, intimacy problems (T_T)
ke maybe sebab i went out with the wrong person. if i go out with the person i like, maybe i dun feel what i felt last night...i hope that's the situation i'm in...
OMG! i just realized something. dinner & movie. isn't that what people who are dating do? ke i think too much?!
i'm starting to regret now. what the hell did i just do last night. now i nak YM pon cam takot nnt die buzz...adeh~
i realize i dun like going out with just ONE guy. sbb bile kluar, rase macam he watches everything i do. attentive sgt. and i dun like it one bit. maybe that's why i xde bf. i have intimacy problems...great! just great! *sigh* Girls would kill for attention but NO...not me...what is wrong with me? oh right, intimacy problems (T_T)
ke maybe sebab i went out with the wrong person. if i go out with the person i like, maybe i dun feel what i felt last night...i hope that's the situation i'm in...
Complications
OMG OMG OMG !!!!!!
Da gile agaknye ija. Just went out for dinner and movie (Nur Kasih) with A kat Berjaya Time Square…
I understand why I decided to go see a movie with him. Tp last minit, I dah gabra…huhu~ he told me yesterday that he actually had feelings for me back in the days. That the story yang die bgtau psl die suke kt senior die tu is actually me…aigooooooooooo~ on one hand, I think that it’s very brave of him to confess and am very grateful. BUT! On the other, OMG! Thank god I was really blur about this kind of things. If I dpt catch up, mmg tatau la nk handle mcm mane.
This reminds me of my story with hafiz…my first crush. I dun want to be like him. When he knows that I liked him, his actions trus change. Klu dlu, bile jmp je…die senyum from ear to ear. But after he found out, senyum mcm x ikhlas dah. Tau la da ade girlfriend tapi its not like I confess to him and want to be with him. Just suke cenggitu je. If I know he ade girlfriend, I would have backed off. So whats the problem actually? Daripada I can back off and still be friends with him, jadi mcm awkward plak. Terasa sangat bile jmp die that day on my way to play tenis kot. Near MPH and the pool. Now everytime I imagine that I would bump into him in the future, I think I will run as far away from him. Bkn benci pon. Tapi…tatau la, just terasa…tu je…
So now when this happens with me and A, I really want to treat him like a friend like before he confessed to me. Tak nak die terasa. Tapi at the same time, I takot die ingat I baek sgt ngan die and tot maybe he has a chance with me. Da la tgk movie Nur Kasih…adoi la~
Right before I meet him, I seriously gabra. Sampai I text and call ainis. She suruh I act cam bese je…klu he mcm lead to relationship, then pandai2 la mengelat. HELLO! The mengelat thing la yang I tatau nak buat…klu tau, x gabra da. Tapi to hear advice from her, sedikit sebanyak helps me to calm down. Alhamdulillah~
On the way to dinner, die byklah cerite psl his ex-gf, family…pillow talk he sed…lol! Why the hell did I start that stupid pillow talk long2 time ago, I have no clue wutsoever. I try to be friendly and normal…huhu~ but seriously, I’m not gud at this. Not gud at going out with ONE guy, not gud at making conversations with just ONE guy. Stress gile la kan! Smp I sakit perot lps movie tu. Smp2 je kt apartment trus pi tandas (T_T) sayang btol, mkn sedap2 tp sekejap je dok dlm perot. Perot ni pon satu. Tau aje I nak diet. Sbb tu kot die flush awal2…wuuu~
After this, I plak kene blanje die movie and mkn. I seriously won’t make the same mistake twice. Akan ku bawa teman sndri…sesape la…angkut bwk skali…stress2~
Ouh, btw he mentioned about D. Ahhhh…I like him…hehehe~ tgh2 borak ngan A pasal D, he sed that if I minat kt D, he can tolong…he’s still single…in a joking manner…btol2 mntk tolong karang bru tau…lolol!
Da gile agaknye ija. Just went out for dinner and movie (Nur Kasih) with A kat Berjaya Time Square…
I understand why I decided to go see a movie with him. Tp last minit, I dah gabra…huhu~ he told me yesterday that he actually had feelings for me back in the days. That the story yang die bgtau psl die suke kt senior die tu is actually me…aigooooooooooo~ on one hand, I think that it’s very brave of him to confess and am very grateful. BUT! On the other, OMG! Thank god I was really blur about this kind of things. If I dpt catch up, mmg tatau la nk handle mcm mane.
This reminds me of my story with hafiz…my first crush. I dun want to be like him. When he knows that I liked him, his actions trus change. Klu dlu, bile jmp je…die senyum from ear to ear. But after he found out, senyum mcm x ikhlas dah. Tau la da ade girlfriend tapi its not like I confess to him and want to be with him. Just suke cenggitu je. If I know he ade girlfriend, I would have backed off. So whats the problem actually? Daripada I can back off and still be friends with him, jadi mcm awkward plak. Terasa sangat bile jmp die that day on my way to play tenis kot. Near MPH and the pool. Now everytime I imagine that I would bump into him in the future, I think I will run as far away from him. Bkn benci pon. Tapi…tatau la, just terasa…tu je…
So now when this happens with me and A, I really want to treat him like a friend like before he confessed to me. Tak nak die terasa. Tapi at the same time, I takot die ingat I baek sgt ngan die and tot maybe he has a chance with me. Da la tgk movie Nur Kasih…adoi la~
Right before I meet him, I seriously gabra. Sampai I text and call ainis. She suruh I act cam bese je…klu he mcm lead to relationship, then pandai2 la mengelat. HELLO! The mengelat thing la yang I tatau nak buat…klu tau, x gabra da. Tapi to hear advice from her, sedikit sebanyak helps me to calm down. Alhamdulillah~
On the way to dinner, die byklah cerite psl his ex-gf, family…pillow talk he sed…lol! Why the hell did I start that stupid pillow talk long2 time ago, I have no clue wutsoever. I try to be friendly and normal…huhu~ but seriously, I’m not gud at this. Not gud at going out with ONE guy, not gud at making conversations with just ONE guy. Stress gile la kan! Smp I sakit perot lps movie tu. Smp2 je kt apartment trus pi tandas (T_T) sayang btol, mkn sedap2 tp sekejap je dok dlm perot. Perot ni pon satu. Tau aje I nak diet. Sbb tu kot die flush awal2…wuuu~
After this, I plak kene blanje die movie and mkn. I seriously won’t make the same mistake twice. Akan ku bawa teman sndri…sesape la…angkut bwk skali…stress2~
Ouh, btw he mentioned about D. Ahhhh…I like him…hehehe~ tgh2 borak ngan A pasal D, he sed that if I minat kt D, he can tolong…he’s still single…in a joking manner…btol2 mntk tolong karang bru tau…lolol!
Tuesday, May 17, 2011
godaan~
lol! tajuk cam agak menyimpang...hehehe~
malam td or more specifically, midnite, kuler ajak mkn kt YM. adoi la~ seriously,godaan btol...huhu~ da la tgh lapar. tapi pk2 da midnite, nak siap2, drive 15 min, with a guy lg...aih~ dilemma btol. "jgn cari pasal" words that i repeat over & over again. thankfully, die tak ajak sungguh2...senang sket nak tahan godaan...wuuu~ tak jadi la :P megi jugak peneman setia :)
da lama x around guys, rase mcm buaya la plak...haha~ wtf! have to remind myself, they are just friends and juniors. dun make any trouble, ija! fokus on projek!
dem! bau ayam goreng (T_T) cmne nk fokus ni...adeh~
malam td or more specifically, midnite, kuler ajak mkn kt YM. adoi la~ seriously,godaan btol...huhu~ da la tgh lapar. tapi pk2 da midnite, nak siap2, drive 15 min, with a guy lg...aih~ dilemma btol. "jgn cari pasal" words that i repeat over & over again. thankfully, die tak ajak sungguh2...senang sket nak tahan godaan...wuuu~ tak jadi la :P megi jugak peneman setia :)
da lama x around guys, rase mcm buaya la plak...haha~ wtf! have to remind myself, they are just friends and juniors. dun make any trouble, ija! fokus on projek!
dem! bau ayam goreng (T_T) cmne nk fokus ni...adeh~
Monday, May 16, 2011
Jiran
jiran baru ni mesra plak...jiran dpn umah...kebetulan he's coming out and i'm going in...tny keje ktne? study ktne? thn bape? hm...seb baek ade family. klu x, dan2 akan ku stamp IGNORE...lol!
tgh2 nk unpack, skype jap ngan parents...nk bgtau da slamat smp. gumbiranya dorg dpt skype ngan daughter tersayang...hehe~ biase la tu, baru2 nk gune skype :P
dah abes skype, musteelme ym plak. da lama xjmp die. da bertunang rupenyer. die jemput pi kenduri kawen die this december...adoi la kn...tp klu ade member pegi skali, ok je :D ingat jugak die kt senior tue ni...huhu~
dah borak2 ngan die, rupe2nye die xabes study. skang ni trus keje kt butterworth. masalah kewangan die kate...tried to persuade die to sambung study tp xjadi. he made up his mind oredy. klu x, xkan nk kawen dah kot...huhu~
i guess i'm lucky in many ways. xde masalah kewangan. ade family & friends yg support me continuing my studies. xde yg sindir2 sbb xabes belajar lg...hm..klu uncle & aunty tu ade la kot sindir2 kt blakang...asek tny kt nenek, "ija watpe skang?" da konfius da. tny sbb amek berat or ...
nenek plak asek bgtau me to go apply for guru. aih~ seswai ke nk jd guru...takot student gangster je...byk dgr cerita2 student wat havoc ngan guru (T_T)
wutever la...itu len kali pk. skang fokus on projek...
tgh2 nk unpack, skype jap ngan parents...nk bgtau da slamat smp. gumbiranya dorg dpt skype ngan daughter tersayang...hehe~ biase la tu, baru2 nk gune skype :P
dah abes skype, musteelme ym plak. da lama xjmp die. da bertunang rupenyer. die jemput pi kenduri kawen die this december...adoi la kn...tp klu ade member pegi skali, ok je :D ingat jugak die kt senior tue ni...huhu~
dah borak2 ngan die, rupe2nye die xabes study. skang ni trus keje kt butterworth. masalah kewangan die kate...tried to persuade die to sambung study tp xjadi. he made up his mind oredy. klu x, xkan nk kawen dah kot...huhu~
i guess i'm lucky in many ways. xde masalah kewangan. ade family & friends yg support me continuing my studies. xde yg sindir2 sbb xabes belajar lg...hm..klu uncle & aunty tu ade la kot sindir2 kt blakang...asek tny kt nenek, "ija watpe skang?" da konfius da. tny sbb amek berat or ...
nenek plak asek bgtau me to go apply for guru. aih~ seswai ke nk jd guru...takot student gangster je...byk dgr cerita2 student wat havoc ngan guru (T_T)
wutever la...itu len kali pk. skang fokus on projek...
Wednesday, May 11, 2011
Salam~
I just registered for FYP yesterday kat galeri admin. Tgh2 tunggu tu, byk plak foreigners datang untuk daftar masters/phd. Anyways, these foreigner guys…bile dorg jmp, mcm biase la salam each other. Tp yg SHOCK nye ialah bile dorg salam ala2 pompuan. Muah2 kiri kanan 3 kali…lol! Siap ade bunyik lagi…adeh (-_-)
My imagination suddenly ran somewhere that it’s not supposed to be...hehe~ and I think they ACTUALLY choose who they decide to *kiss*kiss*kiss*. I began wandering if there are gays among them…aigoo~ my twisted mind (>_<)
Ouh, terserempak dgn Kuler time nak register subjek kt ITMS…ingatkn nk wat xknal je…kot2 die blah…TAPI! Tak interesting la klu citer cenggitu kan? Buat jadi drama sure x laku…huhu~ And people say real life x same dengan citer2 drama…WRONG! He actually tego me and borak kejap…hmm…how do I describe this feeling…embarrassed that I haven’t finish my studies but at the same time happy sebab da lama x jmp kawan2 (^^) da debab da la si Kuler ni…hahaha~ tgh bahagia kot :P I hope I won’t turn that way when it’s my turn. I’ll drag my man to the gym with me and exercise same2…hoho~
Aih, kla…da lama sgt la plak break time. Kene sambung try buat DFD. HWAITING!!!
My imagination suddenly ran somewhere that it’s not supposed to be...hehe~ and I think they ACTUALLY choose who they decide to *kiss*kiss*kiss*. I began wandering if there are gays among them…aigoo~ my twisted mind (>_<)
Ouh, terserempak dgn Kuler time nak register subjek kt ITMS…ingatkn nk wat xknal je…kot2 die blah…TAPI! Tak interesting la klu citer cenggitu kan? Buat jadi drama sure x laku…huhu~ And people say real life x same dengan citer2 drama…WRONG! He actually tego me and borak kejap…hmm…how do I describe this feeling…embarrassed that I haven’t finish my studies but at the same time happy sebab da lama x jmp kawan2 (^^) da debab da la si Kuler ni…hahaha~ tgh bahagia kot :P I hope I won’t turn that way when it’s my turn. I’ll drag my man to the gym with me and exercise same2…hoho~
Aih, kla…da lama sgt la plak break time. Kene sambung try buat DFD. HWAITING!!!
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)