Complications

OMG OMG OMG !!!!!!
Da gile agaknye ija. Just went out for dinner and movie (Nur Kasih) with A kat Berjaya Time Square…

I understand why I decided to go see a movie with him. Tp last minit, I dah gabra…huhu~ he told me yesterday that he actually had feelings for me back in the days. That the story yang die bgtau psl die suke kt senior die tu is actually me…aigooooooooooo~ on one hand, I think that it’s very brave of him to confess and am very grateful. BUT! On the other, OMG! Thank god I was really blur about this kind of things. If I dpt catch up, mmg tatau la nk handle mcm mane.

This reminds me of my story with hafiz…my first crush. I dun want to be like him. When he knows that I liked him, his actions trus change. Klu dlu, bile jmp je…die senyum from ear to ear. But after he found out, senyum mcm x ikhlas dah. Tau la da ade girlfriend tapi its not like I confess to him and want to be with him. Just suke cenggitu je. If I know he ade girlfriend, I would have backed off. So whats the problem actually? Daripada I can back off and still be friends with him, jadi mcm awkward plak. Terasa sangat bile jmp die that day on my way to play tenis kot. Near MPH and the pool. Now everytime I imagine that I would bump into him in the future, I think I will run as far away from him. Bkn benci pon. Tapi…tatau la, just terasa…tu je…

So now when this happens with me and A, I really want to treat him like a friend like before he confessed to me. Tak nak die terasa. Tapi at the same time, I takot die ingat I baek sgt ngan die and tot maybe he has a chance with me. Da la tgk movie Nur Kasih…adoi la~

Right before I meet him, I seriously gabra. Sampai I text and call ainis. She suruh I act cam bese je…klu he mcm lead to relationship, then pandai2 la mengelat. HELLO! The mengelat thing la yang I tatau nak buat…klu tau, x gabra da. Tapi to hear advice from her, sedikit sebanyak helps me to calm down. Alhamdulillah~

On the way to dinner, die byklah cerite psl his ex-gf, family…pillow talk he sed…lol! Why the hell did I start that stupid pillow talk long2 time ago, I have no clue wutsoever. I try to be friendly and normal…huhu~ but seriously, I’m not gud at this. Not gud at going out with ONE guy, not gud at making conversations with just ONE guy. Stress gile la kan! Smp I sakit perot lps movie tu. Smp2 je kt apartment trus pi tandas (T_T) sayang btol, mkn sedap2 tp sekejap je dok dlm perot. Perot ni pon satu. Tau aje I nak diet. Sbb tu kot die flush awal2…wuuu~

After this, I plak kene blanje die movie and mkn. I seriously won’t make the same mistake twice. Akan ku bawa teman sndri…sesape la…angkut bwk skali…stress2~

Ouh, btw he mentioned about D. Ahhhh…I like him…hehehe~ tgh2 borak ngan A pasal D, he sed that if I minat kt D, he can tolong…he’s still single…in a joking manner…btol2 mntk tolong karang bru tau…lolol!